STUPID STUPID SICKNESS,ILLNESS, YUCK

well I am tired. I am just tired. I am still being upbeat but darnit I am tired. Tired of being broke. Tired of school. Tired of cleaning endlessly and most of all tired of the baby sickness. I don't know what to do. We go back to the immunologist at emory soon. I just am ick. and I have a bunch of bills regarding this that came over the weekend and I am like why should i pay when this is not fixed!!! but then I have to remember to be greatful for what I do have. But ugh. I am supposed to take her off her medication every now and then to see what happens. Hahaaaa so fun. Last time was just a notch below medical emergency and I didn't give it to her last night and last night and today were awful. She looks crazy acts crazy and I feel lost. what do you do???? I have now been to:
3 pediatricians
1 dermatologist
1 specialized dermatologist
too many to count er visits
1 immunologist
1 allergist
and here we are. still after almost 6 MONTHS. I know I am feeling sorry for myself. but whatever I am cranky. what's the next step?????????

My grandmother's things

Tonight I was looking through my grandmother's recipe box. I have looked through it so many times and I love all the recipes. Some she cut out of magazines and taped them to an index card and then would comment on the recipe. Others are her handwriting which is very cool and then there are some she has written and then put whose recipe it originally was. I love having this little piece of my grandmother. When she died I was single and living the single life and moving around and whatever. I got to pick a few things of hers to keep. I am soooooo glad I was not an idiot and was able to keep up with them. I have to say they are probably some of my favorite things I have. The recipe box of course is a favorite but I think my all time favorite is this little wall hanging in the bathroom of a little boy getting in the tub with his frog. I remember being little and when I would visit my grandparents and have to go to the bathroom I would stare at that thing, I loved it. And now it's in my bathroom. I think it's awesome. I got a couple of towels-pink ones of course and I use them all the time. I love them. I also got some doilies. Right now I am not using them. When I was single I had them on my dresser but now when laundry and little hands I feel better packing them away till the girls are bigger. Oh and another item that I adore is my little chickens. I collect chickens for my kitchen and my grandmother had a collection as well. I got these tiny little chickens. They are soooo cute. I know there are some things I am forgetting There are some things I packed away for awhile so they will not get broken. HMMM I will have to think about it and post more later. So this week has been slightly exhausting. School started this week and It has been insane. I will have to elaborate later. Let me just say this- It should no longer be luck of the irish---it should be luck of Kelli. Ugh you know- you step in poop and you say well at least I wasnt bare foot. Thats luck of the irish. anyway more later

cleaning up

Well I thought I would post a few pictures from our fantastic Christmas! I had a great Christmas and I am sad it's over but I am optimistic on the year to come. I am hopeful. I am not excited about Keelin going back to school and me going back to school and all that stuff. I have really enjoyed all of us hanging around the house. I got all the Christmas stuff down last night and I have most of the house cleaned which makes me feel really good. I have a nursing exam Jan 9th so I need to be studying it is for a nursing program I am TRYING to get into. Soooooo competitive. Some of these programs i am applying to only take like 30-40 people!!! But like I said I am being hopeful! Right now Shawn's son is here visiting over the holidays and they are getting ready to watch the Falcon's play. So my house has been pretty busy!! I will post more pictures later!!!!

Missing MY Kansas Christmas.

Well it's the day after Christmas and I am sad. But that's the usual for me. I am silly I know. I am a HUGE CHRISTMAS GOOBER. I think I wait all year for Christmas. I can't wait to watch all the cheezy lifetime movies and all the rest of my traditions. I think my problem comes from my family. My Christmas growing up was always a drawn out process. It would start with Santa coming early like on the 22 or 23rd. And then going to Kansas, Christmas eve at The church in Wellington(my favorite part always being silent night with candles in the dark) Christmas day at the Shore's then days following with various family members, Gram, aunts, uncles, cousins(cousin reunion at Dixie's), Having soooooo much fun. I guess I have always identified myself in that way. That that part of my family is who I am. I don't know if they know that or understand that. It is just such a huge part of who I am and how I feel. My love for them, their lives, that part of the country haunts me. yes haunts. because it is so close but so far away. I wish I could readily be apart of it but financially I can't. I can't wait for the day that I can just plan a trip and do it! Ugh so icky sad!!!!! Even Keelin gets it. She cried and said she wants to be in Kansas. Anyway, wish I was there, want to be there, will eventually be there. Love you all and miss you all.

I have gone Christmas Crazy!!!!!!!!

I love Christmas. I always have. This year Christmas time has been really great. Crazy as that is because of Shawn's layoff and all but it's been great. I think alot of it has to do with Shawn. He has fully thrown himself into Christmas for the first time. He is with me on all the cheezy stuff I want to do, all the cheezy Christmas movies I want to watch, driving around looking at people's Christmas lights, help me decorate the house WHILE watching cheezy movies, put Christmas lights all over the outside of the house and all of this with a fantastic cheery attitude! He said he realizes it's all about the kids and making really great family memories for them, yes he actually said that. And he actually said he is really enjoying it for the first time and can't figure out why he has been such a pain in the butt in the past. Woo hoo for me. I guess if I get a warm and fuzzy family in exchange for a layoff well I guess we will just figure it out and deal. It's funny usually when i am worried about money I am twisted in knots. For the most part I am happy!?!? Weird. Anyway since my husband is so on board with EVERYTHING I am getting more things done this year. Like I already said we have watched Christmas movies just about every night and we have driven around looking at people's lights, gone to Life's Nights of Lights, I have had the Christmas stuff up since the day after Thanksgiving(didn't happen last year), Listened to Christmas music every time we get in the car, actually let me take 20 or more pictures of us trying to get a somewhat normal one for Christmas cards and NO ONE complained!, me and Keelin made a gingerbread house, and tonight we baked cookies. Tomorrow we are making Christmas candy. I don't know guess I have gone Christmas crazy! but I like it!!!!!

Swap Gift

I got my swap gift today and I LOVE IT!!! so me! Natalie made mine and I love it. It is a Christmas pillow with a sewn on gift tag that says Merry McChristmas. Awesome. Now my mission for next year is to find some cool Merry McChristmas cards!!!!!!

fun fun

well i thought i would blog a smidge. I have to post these pictures of me and brenna. SOOOOO funny and we cannot be held accountable for our looks. We went to bed at like 2am and were at the flea market at 7am-it was like 1 1/2 hours from my house-also it was 20 degrees out and we had nowhere to go but outside. We were there till like 2pm so we looked a little rough. I had fun though and made like $75 selling my old clothes so wooohoo. Tonight shawn and i took the girls to the varsity for hot dogs then we went to life college for the christmas light thing and it was awesome sooooooooo much fun! Kinsey kept saying cute cute cute, we didnt tell keelin what we were doing so she was sooooooo excited!!!! ILOVE CHRISTMAS!!!!!